A Reflection of the Year 2024

December 31, 2024

A Reflection of the Year 2024

Dear Elder Yu,

This is a brand new experience for you to celebrate New Year in a different country. I do not why I feel you are a little bit stressed out and down during the last Monday video call. I hope you are not.

For these past few days, I kept on reading this unknown author’s article about what he/she has been through for the past year of 2024. I don’t know if it’s because of the algorithm or because the text is so pertinent. I feel it is so resonant to me and my current situation:

I do not hate you, 2024, but you were a difficult year, full of challenges, changes, and learning. You showed me that life can change in the blink of an eye, and taught me to trust myself more. But above all, you made me understand that my health, whether physical, emotional, or mental, is what really matters. You showed me that not every question needs an immediate answer, and not every ending is a loss. You taught me that stillness is not stagnation. Sometimes, it is just like life making space for something new.

So no, I don't hate you. But I won't forgive you either, at least not yet. You dragged me through truths I did not want to face, through loss I was not ready to feel. You left me with wounds that have not closed, with breaks that have not settled into anything I can understand. I do not see light pouring in, not yet. But maybe that is the lesson. You did not come to fix me or redeem me. You came to strip away the illusion that life is anything but unpredictable, relentless, and brutally honest.

You did not rebuild me. You left me with the choice to do it myself. So thank you, 2024. You were not easy, but you were necessary.

我不恨你，2024年，但你是艱難的一年，充滿了挑戰、變化和學習。

你讓我明白生活可以瞬間改變，教會我更加信任自己。

但最重要的是，你讓我明白到不論是身體、情緒還是心理健康，都是最重要的。

你讓我知道不是所有的問題都需要立即的答案，並不是所有的結束都是損失。

你教會我寧靜並不代表停滯。有時，它只是生命在為新的事物騰出空間。

所以不，我不恨你。

但我也不原諒你，至少現在還不行。

你把我拖入了我不想面對的真相，讓我感受到我還沒準備好的失落。

你讓我留下了尚未癒合的傷口，和尚無法理解的破碎。

我還沒有看到光明湧入，尚未。

但或許那就是教訓。

你不是為了治癒我或拯救我而來。

你來是為了剝去對生活任何幻想的假象，

生活是多麼不可預測、無情且殘酷的事實。

你沒有重建我。你留給我選擇，讓我自己來重建。

所以謝謝你，2024年。

你並不容易，但你是必要的。

Honestly, I couldn’t agree more with this and I am not denying Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ were always there when I was knocked off by the challenges. I can feel Their presence. There are lessons to learn and to grow. Just that, the speed I learning is not as fast as what my husband wanted to be.

I am grateful for 2024 too, because I saw both my children grow stronger in the gospel and start to live in it; because I know they know God loves them and they learn how to rely on the Savior; because I know things happened for a reason which the Lord will unfold and reveal to me when the time is right; because I know that we are in His good hand. I say this in the name of my beloved Savior, even Jesus Christ. Amen.

Love,

Mommy

Receive Divine Help for Life’s Battles

Dear Elder Yu,

My job has been busy and having a project handover deadline and a tight schedule to catch up lately. It was always physically exhausting and drained brain come back home from work. I am really glad that have Annabelle who takes care of the daily house chores and with Ally’s stuffs.

It feels like I have to go through a mini daily battle every day to tackle things that pop up suddenly in the projects, trying to solve them one by one at a time. I feel blessed that I can feel the Lord watching over me every moment of my daily life because I can see how some ad-hoc things in projects turn out to be just fine at the end of the day. And I am grateful for that!

It is so co-incident that I read this article last Sunday which I wanted to write to you but did not manage to. It coincides with the previous week’s Come, Follow Me focus on the Book of Mormon Alma chapter 43 – 52. And I hope this sharing might help you when you go through a little storm in your days trying to be a good missionary of the Lord.

It is natural to wonder why Mormon included the war stories between the Nephites and the Lamanites when he had limited space on the plates. We indeed have our share of wars in the latter days, but Mormon’s remarks are still valuable for more than just explaining the tactics and the tragedy of warfare. His teachings also equip us to fight the war that “we are all enlisted”, which is the battle that we wage every day against the forces of evil. This is a real war, and the result will have an impact on our eternal lives.

Elder Dale G. Renlund shared 3 principles that we able to be like Moroni in battling our adversaries in our daily lives:

1. Understand Our Purpose

We must never lose sight of the larger picture of our divine nature, everlasting destiny, and the evil forces that oppose us. Correctly comprehending Heavenly Father's plan will inspire us to continue battling for our eternal salvation and release from spiritual bonds.

2. Strategize for Success

We can employ the same methods Moroni used to cope with spiritual adversaries. We might begin by realizing what Satan is trying to do in our lives. He tries to derail us from our mission. When confronted with temptation, we must ask ourselves:

• How does this action on my part stack up against the revealed word of God?
• What are the consequences of taking this action?
• Will this action help me fulfill my purpose on earth?

We should also comprehend the consequences of succumbing to even little temptations. As we succumb to temptation, we swallow "poison by degrees" (Alma 47:18), a highly successful method employed by the powers of evil that can result in spiritually disastrous consequences.

I think that is how adversaries always make us feel as if we are not enough, and never enough! Just remember the Savior when this kind of thought comes into your mind.

We can fortify ourselves against Satan's temptations by following the guidance of our latter-day prophet. This helps us maintain an everlasting viewpoint from which to judge our deeds. Strategizing how we will deal with temptations in all aspects of our lives will help us make better decisions at the moment. Preplanned methods and techniques will assist us in avoiding diversions from our everlasting mission.

3. Prepare for Metaphorical Battles

Spiritually, we prepare individually by keeping the commandments of God. We make and keep covenants with God that draw the power of Jesus Christ into our lives. We can better prepare by strengthening our families. We can collectively gain strength and prepare for our spiritual battles as we join in communities of Saints.

I am indeed grateful for your companion by your side to uplift, encourage, share, and guide you along the way. Please tell Elder Fleshman that I am thanking him and grateful for being such a good companion to you!

Like Captain Moroni, we can receive divine help and power from the Lord for the battles we face in life. It is just like what you have been facing as a missionary, and myself as a wife, mother, and employee. Moroni demonstrated concepts that we can use to meet the challenges of our modern existence. As we exercise our faith in the Savior Jesus Christ, He will shower us with His strength.

After reading your email, I just felt as if I needed to tell Elder Stratfold and Elder Paewai about your thoughts on both of them and how grateful you are for them to teach our family the restored gospel of Jesus Christ. I am reaching out to both on Messenger. Elder Stratfold was so happy to read my message and he is happy to know that you are already on your mission to serve the Lord. And, here is his message:

“Of course, I remember you and your family! It was the happiest time of my mission. Thank you so much for your message, it has made my week.

I am so happy to hear that Isaac is on His mission, it makes me feel very old as I remember him as a 9-year-old. It was such a pleasure teaching all of you, thank you so much for being so patient and receptive.

My Wife and I now have 3 kids, we had twins born in January last year so life has been very busy. We are planning on coming for the dedication of the Singapore temple and driving from Singapore and then up through Malaysia so we would love to see you all then, that will be a few years away of course.

Give my Love to the rest of the family, especially Isaac as he is serving the Lord, I am so proud of Him, Love you guys How are the rest of the family?”

Lastly, Heavenly Father believes you can be successful. Strive to see the value in yourself as He does! Even though this quote Elder Holland addressed to all the mothers, I want you to know that his counsel applies to you too, “Be peaceful. Believe in God and yourself. You are doing better than you think you are.” Remember your purpose and the value you bring to everyone around you. You can do this!

Love,

Mommy

Grateful for Gaining Strength from Your Testimony

Dear Elder Yu,

I do not know how to describe to you the joy I felt when I read your email. You have learned and gained so much knowledge that the Lord wants you to know during your first living endowment! I love how you came to understand the simple truths and the knowledge of how much Heavenly Father loves His children.

I could not comprehend the things that I learned in my endowment during our 1^st temple trip at Cebu Philippines Temple. It took me some time, even my second trip to the temple – Hong Kong Temple, only to realize the love of Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ for me and my small family.

This brings my memories back then to our family Hong Kong temple trip in 2019. During our family temple trip: Annabelle and you went missing in the busy streets of Hong Kong; your Daddy lost his job; your Daddy’s car broke down on the highway on his way back to Kulai after he came back from temple, and many more.

I realized that Heavenly Father blessed us with so much more after the Hong Kong temple trip. Annabelle and you gained your testimonies: both of you know that Heavenly Father hears and answers your prayers; You all have the testimony of the Holy Ghost that guided you to find your way back to the group safely and went back to the temple patron house.

I knew that it was not a coincidence that your Daddy lost his job while we were in Hong Kong. I know that Heavenly Father wants him to come back, He wants him to stay nearer to us, closer to the family, rather than having a woman outside in JB.

Everything happened for my sake and our family's good. I am so touched that I know that all these happened because Heavenly Father knows that I am trying my best to be faithful, striving to keep my covenant with Him. I can feel Heavenly Father’s love for me and my family.

I love how you mentioned that you can feel the Lord’s presence standing beside you while you are in the Celestial Room, checking on you how’s life being on earth? Is life treating you well and did you have fun? You are so hilarious on this!

My first thought was that it was not fun at all! Maybe it is because I have been too hard on myself facing all these challenges and feeling alone. Too many frustrations, upsets, and disappointments blurred my mind and hardened my heart to feel the presence of the Holy Spirit!

Your first invitation to me to write and share with you has somehow lessened the burden on my shoulders as if the Savior is yoking with me together. I can feel as if I am gaining the strength I need, the Holy Spirit flooded me with the memories and the testimonies that I had to me, the comforting words from Annabelle whenever I was feeling down. I know that the Lord is working on me through Elder Yu and Annabelle.

Like you said, “He will never abandon us but rather wants to help us. And we can get a of His divine help and guidance, when we do our very best, to obey our covenants with Him. Unless Heavenly Father breaks the promise, we are always in a covenant with Him. No matter what.”

I love your parable about an orange. It reminds me of “becoming”. The gospel of Jesus Christ is about the continuous active process of becoming. This is something that I learned in this week’s Come, Follow Me when reading Alma Chapters 36 – 38. It was the counsel that Alma the Younger gave to both his sons, Helaman and Siblon. Alma testifies to Helaman of his conversion after seeing an angel of God. Alma is the perfect example of “a becoming”. We might not as Alma as a singular event, but rather every small and simple means that makes up the process of becoming. It is ok if we are not perfect, but we are striving. That is the idea of becoming.

I feel as if everything is so coinciding when receiving your email and it is healing to write my thoughts and shares with you. I gained so many insights from you, Elder Yu, and my beloved daughter Annabelle Yu. Both of you indeed strengthened me and gave me the courage and strength I needed to go through the path before me.

Seeing you standing in front of the temple, made me want to go back to the temple and feel His presence. I know that Heavenly Father wants me to return to the temple because there is something He wants to reveal to me. It is stated in my patriarchal blessings that I will receive revelations about my personal lives, I will receive revelations of the lives of my family and I will receive revelations from Heavenly Father that His love for me is pure and exquisite.

Frankly, I have a feeling, and not sure if this time, the relationship between your Daddy and I could work or fix back anymore. But I just got calm and assured feelings in my heart that everything would work out for good for me. So, please do not worry and I know that Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ are watching over us!

Love,

Mommy

P.S. About the temple work, let me sort my family tree out then will give you the information. I actually have a name, my great grandfather but I only have his surname, I do not have his first name, as I have tried to search for some time. However, the FamilySearch system showed that his name is ready for temple ordinances even only has a surname. I wish I could have his first name and I know how to address him… if not, I can only call him 陈先生 or 陈太公 …hmmm…

Grateful for Your Questions

Dear Elder Yu,

Time flies, and this is your third week in the MTC. I hope you are well adjusting to your new life in Utah. We could see your bright smile and joy for the past 2 weeks when you video-called us during your P-Day! We love our missionary son so much!

Things happened between your dad and me since you left for Utah for your mission. I know I shouldn’t tell you all these things and burden you with all these things. It should have been resolved between myself and your dad, but it was so hard...

Your Dad kept emphasizing, that Alvin and Yi Peng can't be husband and wife any longer. He wants to be just a friend, not a couple in a relationship. Last Sunday, I saw his video posted on his TikTok account, he was having breakfast with a girl whom he called his lover in the video. I was very upset and called him immediately. I asked him why he treated me like this. I stopped the call, and your dad texted me a long message later in the evening. I did not talk to your dad since last Sunday as he only called Annabelle. I do not know how am I going to live through the past week.

Until last week after your P-Day call, and I asked you about the conversation you talked about, you posted questions to me, which reminds me that I should put my focus on Jesus Christ instead of dwelling on the sadness, frustrations, disappointments, and anger, which I cannot control. I felt something in my mind and heart as your questions directed my attention back to the Savior.

You asked me: “What made you want to be baptized and enter the church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints? And what was/is your testimony when you entered that covenant with the Lord? Cause making that decision is a very hard yet sacred choice that you have made. So I wanted to understand why you choose to follow the Lord ever since that moment when the missionary invited you to be baptized.”

Well, to answer your first question, “What made you want to be baptized and enter the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints?”

I think I shared this a long time ago. time ago with you and Annabelle, that I always believed and knew that, there is a Creator even when I was much younger as a primary child. I am grateful that I have a mother who gave me no restrictions when I wanted to seek learning, even a long-distance correspondence of religion studies to learn about Buddhism and God.

I think the main reason why I want to be baptized and enter the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is because I prayed to Heavenly Father in Jesus’s name to seek His help to gather our family as a whole again after your Daddy and Mummy went through our first divorce. I promised Jesus Christ that I would someday go into His Church as a family and in my heart, I was wondering which church I should go to. When our family walked into the baptism fond, I knew that the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is the only true church on earth and led by the Savior because of the little promise I made at that moment, only Heavenly Father, Jesus Christ, and myself know about it. And He made it happen, bringing a broken family back together again!

“What was/is your testimony when you entered that covenant with the Lord?”

When I entered the covenant with the Lord, I think I had the testimony that I have a Heavenly Father who loves me and my family so much, that He sent His only Begotten Son Jesus Christ to die and live again for me; I know that Jesus Christ is my Savior. I know that family can be together for all time and eternity; I know that Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ are always with me because I can see Their hands in every single aspect of my life, from helping me to get our current home, how the Lord paved the path in front of me after divorce, reunite with your Daddy, registered of marriage again, and how the Lord directs our family towards His Church. All these are the testimonies that I had. All these small pieces and bits strengthen me to keep the Word of Wisdom, the Law of Tithing, and make myself worthy to enter my baptismal covenant with the Lord. I further walked into the temple and made temple covenants with the Lord, even though I only went to the temple twice.

Writing here, I find that it is funny, as I will still be able to write all these things calmly because I thought it was supposed to be the opposite. Anyway, it is a healing that I can change my focus to the more important matters now. I am grateful to the Lord for getting me to where I am now. The Holy Ghost has brought back my sacred spiritual memories reminding me to remember the Savior. I am thankful to Elder Yu, for posting these questions to me because I know you are guided and instructed by the Lord.

I am grateful to Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ, who gave me the precious opportunity to become a mother to His divine son and daughter, Issac and Annabelle. After you go on with your mission, Annabelle helps a lot in the home. She takes care of her Mummy like her big brother. I feel blessed that I have 2 not so little guardian angels anymore to teach, share, encourage, uplift, love, and care for me! I love both of you so much!

Elder Yu, I hope I can learn and grow spiritually together with you over the coming 2 years. So, please do not worry about what happened in the home and focus on your two years to serve the Lord—"invite others to come unto Christ by helping them receive the restored gospel through faith in Jesus Christ and His Atonement, repentance, baptism, receiving the gift of the Holy Ghost, and enduring to the end.”

Love,

Mommy

Image via https://latterdaysaintmag.com/hand-in-hand-with-angels/#google_vignette