Trust…

[0:11 am, 06/11/2018] C Alvin Yu: Sorry misses yr call... still celebrate ya

[0:11 am, 06/11/2018] C Alvin Yu: G99

[0:11 am, 06/11/2018] C Alvin Yu: Love u all..and happy deevali

[4:56 pm, 06/11/2018] C Alvin Yu: This 2 days lits invitations… sorry ye… now at indian party house again… masai ye… tell kids will call back tmr ya takecare

[5:31 pm, 06/11/2018] ipeng: Sure is Indian party but no others ya… we love you

[5:41 pm, 06/11/2018] ipeng: These days we never manage to WhatsApp call you during night time… you are always function outside… Saturday Sunday Monday and today…

[5:54 pm, 06/11/2018] ipeng: I know it’s not easy to be out there alone working for the sake of better financial and family life… and it’s not easy for the kids and me as well… but I want you to know that all of your sacrifices, hardship, and loneliness, we know it… please don’t feel you are alone out there but we are always with you, even most of the time you just see us happy face but didn’t talk much… I know that all these hardship that we are going through right now would worth it in the future, as God is always watching over our family dearly, closely. We love you

[9:28 pm, 06/11/2018] ipeng: Dear… I still love you and in love with you… do you feel me? How can I do better to feel you? I just felt as our feelings become hardened and distant… or I never been walk into your heart before… please help me to understand you better, listening what’s in your mind better… so that we can renew the music in our marriage… I know it’s probably need a lots and lots of tunings! Thanks for all the patience that you have towards me all these years… all these while, I was too busy focus on living the gospel and try to be a good follower but forgetting and let my marriage be what they are now… without realizing that our marriage is important to God, that we are expected to do everything we can to keep them strong and alive, beautiful, sweet and growing. I love you so so much…

[5:52 am, 07/11/2018] ipeng: It’s really strange that don’t even a call during these night and you only pick up call but not video calls as usuals…

[6:05 am, 07/11/2018] ipeng: Have you been in KL or driving back to JB now?

[6:14 am, 07/11/2018] ipeng: Why you keep hang up the calls?

[6:16 am, 07/11/2018] ipeng: Tell me what’s your heart desires? And I will fulfill what you want! I really really dissapointed and upsets after so many years…

[6:16 am, 07/11/2018] ipeng: Or you have been struggle too?

[6:18 am, 07/11/2018] ipeng: Why to be faithful and honest is just not easy?

[6:19 am, 07/11/2018] ipeng: Please don't pretend don't know again. We are adults enough

[7:57 am, 07/11/2018] C Alvin Yu: Dear gd morning… pls omit all messages i dont like to c.  I m not in good condition yesterday… i m also headache how to solve work issue… boss said may terminate both me n Lee service not too sure when but told us standby… anyway i m busy looking job too… sorry dear… i m ok not burst anything… but plz do be patient on me ya tq

[8:08 am, 07/11/2018] ipeng: Dear… I am so sorry that I behaved too emotional, because I do really value what we have now… I am sorry for those hurting words that came out from my mouth… please do hold on, thanks for being patience with me… we love you

[8:09 am, 07/11/2018] C Alvin Yu: No need sorry lah…

These past few weeks I indeed feel disturbed by the series of things happened between our daily video calls that was suddenly changed, and it have bring up my unsure and discmfort that I had experienced years ago… I feel sad and deeply saddened by this thought of mine…

I am indeed a weak person in handling husband and wife relationship… This indeed make me unable to focus on my personal things and the things I supposed to do… Am I the type of woman that is so lousy to marry with?