A Tearful Tuesday…

Another day of tears…

After days of days of calmness and self-hypnotize, my feelings just like riding the roller-coater in the fun fair or theme park.

In the morning I can be very high energetic and calm, but in the afternoon or evening, my mood can just like from the peak of the mountain and drop to the deep valley down, crying and crying non-stop.

Finally, he told me that he visited the lawyer already. Why he keep telling the lies to me? He no longer have feelings towards me? There is another woman in his heart.

And, last Sunday, he is not going to Malacca but to Port Dickson Avillion Resort. That is exactly the same resort I believed he went 5 1/2 years ago with his Thai girl friend.

All these while, I was so amazed with this resort, because I knew it is a beautiful resort long long time ago, everything my dreams and imaginations about this resort had been torn apart in front of me when Cherng told me he stayed there together with May Key, and now he had been there with two different women.

I got the kind of feelings is I would not get whatever I want in my love life. It had been proven before and now. I feel really tired. Why all the true feelings I put in will turn out like that?